I am Norman

Thursday, October 27, 2005

HELP ME

I'm fixing to puke. Really. I'm sitting 20 feet away from my husband... and I can smell him.
He stinks. He's refusing to sleep out in the living room too. But GAAAWDDD the SMELL!

Shower? No, the stink is oozing out of him. He ate half a freaking jar of PICKLED GARLIC. And (as if that's not enough) he also ate 6 banana peppers. He's just wrong.

I would sleep out in the living room if I could, but the baby is in our room (cause we only have a 3 bedroom house), and he doesn't wake up when she cries.

Am I wrong for thinking that eating entire cloves of garlic is cruel? We went to Wal Mart tonight, and I swear people were staying way far away from him. And the worst part is, he's a close talker. He just LOVES to get in your face to talk to you. I hate it. I'm always telling him to back the fuck up. Tonight - I was practically pushing him away. The stink... the stink!!

There are not enough tic-tacs in the world to help him right now.

norman

posted by Norman at 8:42 PM

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7 Comments:

At Friday, October 28, 2005 7:00:00 AM, Tammy

Damn that's funny. I say: Payback!!

Go to Wal-Mart, load up on cabbage, broccoli and beans.

Enjoy!
At Friday, October 28, 2005 10:01:00 AM, Nap Queen

Good suggestion Tammy. I personally love the smell of garlic and used to eat it and onions raw as a child. I was one stinky kid!
At Friday, October 28, 2005 12:38:00 PM, Northwoods Woman

spray him with Lysol.
At Friday, October 28, 2005 4:21:00 PM, Aric Blue

How about tell him he stinks and to go take a shower? If he says no, tell him no sex for a week.

If you already weren't gonna have sex with him for a week, make it two weeks.

If you already weren't gonna have sex with him for two weeks--give it up. He's already having sex elsewhere anyway.
At Friday, October 28, 2005 8:18:00 PM, Mise en Place

Ha! How funny. Garlic is a biggy in my house too, so are the peppers. Honey smells like hell by the end of the night. Brush your teeth, please. He needs to peel the first layer of the inside of his mouth out.

Blah!
At Saturday, October 29, 2005 12:34:00 AM, Christine

Garlic is the worst smell on a human being every created. OMG my heart goes out to you. My son likes those little garlic chips and I can smell him before I even go into his room BLAH!
Oh, and lots of luck with your preschool party. tee hee hee
At Thursday, January 18, 2018 2:03:00 PM, Anonymous

love to look after your baby girl for you