Cute bunny, huh? Yeah...real cute. Little fucker ATTACKED me this morning! Can rabbits get rabies? This cute litte fuzzy bunny chased me down this morning and freaked the crap out of me.
I was walking into work, minding my own business - when WHUMP! Something slammed into my calf. I looked down, and there was a rabbit. That little mofo was about to run into me again. It lunged at me, and I skittered sideways, losing my cup of coffee (CRAP!SHIT!) in the process. Of course, there were witnesses. The transportation crew was sitting outside their little trailer just hoo ha-ing away. I backed up and stared at this deranged rabbit in amazement. All I was trying to do was walk to my building!! There are rabbits all over the freaking place where I work. Usually, they stay in the grassy areas and we people stay on our sidewalks. I was on the sidewalk. The Human Domain. I never ventured into Bunny Domain. I was in the people place, so this bunny was clearly out of line. But he didn't care. I edged closer to the edge of the sidewalk, and trying to ignore the cries of "Hey Norm! Watch out - He's a killer!" and "Run Norman Run!" I slowly made my way towards my building. The rabbit kept watching me. Fricking bizarre. I got about 6 steps away from him and he went after me again, so I did the next logical thing: "AAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HELP ME!!!!!!!!!!!" and took off running. This of course was very entertaining for the watchers. The damn rabbit hit my leg two more times before I made it to my building. I whipped open the door, shut it and heard the rabbit hit the door. DAMN!!
It's got to be one of these things:
1) The rabbit had babies very nearby where I was
2) The rabbit is rabid
3) It's a devil bunny
Now - I've told you this before, but my place of employment is equivalent to the size of a small town. EVERYBODY knows about my attacker this morning. I had people e-mailing me pictures of rabbits. Some of the more creative ones were photo-shopped pictures of rabbits sporting vampire teeth. Another one sent to me was a rabbit that appeared to be posing with its paw on my head (someone photoshopped my badge picture into it) . All.very.entertaining. Har.Dee.Har.Har.
And at the end of the day, the yard crew manager told me that they were going to bait the area around my office building to 'rid' the ferocious beasts. Apparently - they really are kicking around the idea of rabies, and they do need to exterminate the creatures. I am very sad about this. I've been there for 7 years, and I've never been attacked by a rabbit. They are mostly cute little things. I did mention to the yard guy that the rabbit might be drunk. We have been fueling our cars with Ethanol, and the rabbits have been chewing the wires on the cars to get to the alcohol in the gas. Maybe it was a drunk rabbit? Maybe it was hungover? I don't know. All I know is that because I got whammed in the leg by a stupid rabbit - I'll have the deaths of hundreds of rabbits hanging over me. Just call me Elmer freaking Fudd.
That really is a little creepy. I know I'd be staring at that bunny like "WTF is your problem?" and that second charge would have had me running too. Poor rabid rabbit.
Be vewy, vewy qwiet. We're huntin' wabbits!