I'm a lurker and I love your blog!

My worst gift was from a boyfriend. He is a highly paid dr., specializing in allergies. He wasn't a spendthrift generally, but I still expected a nice gift. I got a single cotton turtleneck. It was a ski pattern print. My Grandma had the same one.

The day after we broke up, I loaded that $17.99 L L Bean turtle into the car and drove straight to Goodwill. I hope somebody's Grandma was able to enjoy that well made, but definitely not appropriate for a 32 year old girlfriend top.

Hey Norm! I'm a major book worm. Major. My favorite book store is in the basement of my used to be college...I told my hubs that and one day he was doing a project down there at my old campus. He went to the bookstore and bought me a book! I was in love. seriously that was huge to me...until I got the book. Yeah, apparently, he just got the first book he found and that was it. Didn't really look for a book that I might like. So he got me one about gay women/inspirational coming out of the closet book.

I guess he didn't notice the drawings of naked women on the front cover in a mural. yeah, needless to say, the whole thing was awkward.........

He did NOT get you a tire iron. I so would have hit him with it.

My MIL has this need to buy me clothes. I really wish she wouldn't. I get some pretty ugly sweaters from her. Every. Year.

ROFL!! That's quite a list Norman! I definitely can't top that one.

Norm,

OK, not for Christmas, but for my birthday one year. From my Mom/parents.

Let me just say, if anyone, ANYONE ever tells you to look for something "shiny but soft" when you are searching through stuff for your present from them, just stop what you are doing and walk away. Seriously.

It turned out to be a vintage ~1985-87 sweater with metalic threads for accents. Except, you know, it was also from the thrift store and reeked of incense, it was ~11-14 years old (I must have received it in '98), and it was see-through. Completely. -Not only see-though when it was being worn, but so thin that if you just held the thing up to look at it, you could see right through both layers (and probably watch the tv through it). And it had the really baggy arms (remember those?). It looked like something a crack-whore or prostitute might wear (on a bad day).

Yes, it was that god-awful.

And my parents truly did not understand when I said they might as well take it back or give it to GoodWill, 'cos there was no way on earth I was EVER going to wear it. Never.

-On the plus side, my Mom learned to avoid giving me clothing for a few years, and my husband and I still laugh when one of us says "shiny but soft".

~Andrea

Anon - LOL!!! I would have sprinkled some mold spores in his house!!!!!!! That gift sucks!!!

Vety - I love books too!!! But...but...maybe that was a strategic purchase?? My hubs told me that ALL men fantasize about women together. ALL of them...

Tammy - he did TOO get me a tire iron and I was so very angry with him!!! By the time we got around to the third Xmas, and I opened my new monitor, I told him to open his gift from me and it was a Coach purse... SCORE!! See? The gifting yourself thing works both ways.

Lisa - You can TRY!!! It's not about topping, it's about sharing!!! C'mon!!! What's your worst gift ever??!!

Anonymous Andrea - holy crap. i HAVE that sweater in my closet!! NO SHIT!!! OMG!!OMG!!OMG!!! I've sooooo go to photograph it and show you!!! OMG!!OMG!!! I'LL PUT THE SUCKER ON AND PHOTO IT!!

ROFLMAO!!!

Woohoo--you gave the hubs a Coach purse--love it!

Either I'm having a senior moment or some sort of weird psychological thing where I've blanked out the experience but I truly can't remember any horrible gifts at Christmas time. I guess I trained my two husbands well early on-lol.

Norman I have been with my wife 21 years and she managed once to get me a gift I actually found a use for. Do you know how hard it is to tell the person you love there gift was great when it really sucks.
I made the mistake of telling her the first couple of years I didn't really like what I received. So then she tried to find that special gift. Well it didn't work. I just gave up and told her the gift were awesome. The last couple of years I have bought my own present and let her wrap it.

Hey, Norman! Love your blog... just found you thru China Doll. Hope you don't mind if I link to you from mine...

Anyhoo...

The worst present I ever got was from my mom. It was the book written by Amy Fisher (the one that had the affair with Joey Buddafuco)...

I looked at it and said "Um, Mom. Why did you get this for me?" She said "I know how much you love Star Wars so I thought you would want to read about the girl that was in it!" She had NO idea that that was CARRIE Fisher!

My ex bought me a strap on.
That's why he's my ex.
Top that! LOL

Ok I have a few:

This one's not really a bad gift, just funny. My aunt's in-laws, who I never saw very often, but always remembered to give me a Christmas present, would always, always, ALWAYS get me a bath and body set for christmas. I just thought it was sweet of them to remember me. BUt the funny part is, the last like..4 christmas' that they were alive, they got the exact same set for me every year.

My son's father - for my birthday, he had his mother take him to the Q-mart (a very cheap and dirty flea market near me) and bought the most hideous, white trash outfit you could imagine. Picture this - a white, off the shoulder, puffed sleeve, eyelet lace BELLY shirt - and a blue bandana patterned skirt that could possibly have covered my ass - if I was six! It was completely shiteous.

I'm lucky enough now to have a boyfriend who puts a nice amount of thought into his gifts. (And manages a jewelery store - CHA CHING!) This Christmas, he got together with my best friend's boyfriend, and they bought us both a spa package for the same day so we could go together and get the massage, scalp thingy and mani-pedi...I'm so psyched!

Merry Christmas to you and yours!!

My MiL gave me an Epilady. I tried it one time. I have been convinced of her hatred for me ever since!!!

Worst Christmas gift I had ever gotten was from my husband. Our first Christmas married, he got me a, hold for it, GIFT CARD. And no it was not our first Christmas as a couple. At that point we had been through three Christmases (sp?) together!!! I was so mad. I gave him the "husbands DO NOT give Gift Cards to their spouses if they EVER wish to sleep in the same bedroom again" lecture.